Jonah Hex

The comic book film genre is still a potent money-making tool for Hollywood. The Dark Knight became one of the highest gross films in history two years ago, Iron Man 2 continued paving the way for the cohesive Marvel film-verse and Green Lantern will soon be a household superhero.

Still, for every blockbuster release and those that make comic fans proud that their nerdy addictions are becoming mainstream (or at least less taboo), there are plenty of "lesser" comic properties and failures proving that not every book combining pictures and word balloons should make the transition to the big screen.

Jonah Hex isn't exactly a well-known comic...the ongoing tales of a disfigured cowboy who can talk to the dead and often has supernatural adventures has it's fans (admittedly, I'm not one of them) and has been kicking around DC for nearly 40 years. I'd venture to say his relative anonymity won't be threatened by this film.

Okay, enough dancing around the point...Jonah Hex is a terrible film. After a brief telling of his origin (altered from the comic, I believe), we're quickly thrown into an adventure fueled by vengeance. Hex (Josh Brolin), a bounty hunter who can resurrect the dead by touching them, learns that the man (John Malkovich) who killed his family, scarred him and left him for dead is alive and planning a vicious attack during the country's centennial celebration. After a series of unbelievable gunfights, vision quests and pyrotechnics, victory is had and the country is safe.

This movie truly is that simple and stunningly uncomplicated. Fortunately, it's bare-minimum running time doesn't prolong the boredom with such things as plot, character development or structured story beats. I admired that the filmmakers allowed Brolin's face to be so scarred and Malkovich always plays a decent lunatic. Megan Fox has a glorified couple scene cameo as a prostitute who beds and assists Hex, but for you guys who think she might be worth the time to see this film, you'd be better off browsing through her photos on Google image search.

Rating: F